I think the word accountability at times has an off-putting odor. It smells of Gestapo-like Christianity. That particular feel to the word accountability is unfortunate. The other problem with the normal idea of accountability is that it is always connected to a meeting or an event. Instead, accountability is a Bible-concept that should be a part of our missional life and discipleship life together in the body, the church. But that is where the snag comes. For many people, “church” is something they do on Sunday in a prescribed way and form. The idea that church is a living organism that breathes spiritual life together 24/7 is not always on people’s radar.
So for those of us who do buy into open, honest relationships that foster compassionate care and concern, along with biblical, soul-feeding, we must include good, intentional discussions and questions. These kind of interactions are not “Gestapo-like” but instead are Christ-like communication designed to draw one another out into Pauline care described as a nursing mother and a loving father among the young believers in Thessalonica (I Thess. 1) and the growing concerns in their hearts.
When, as part of your missional accountability, you move into the realm of purity, here are some suggested questions that you might put on the agenda in order to be honest and open in how you are doing in your pursuit of God’s goodness and greatness.
- What were your weak times of temptation lately? (days, times of day, situations)
- What specific thoughts or actions did you allow? If masturbation was involved, confess this struggle and allow others who have struggled with it to help to encourage you to have victory.
- Were there any specific triggers? (events, audio, video, circumstances?)
- How did you respond to failure? Godly sorrow and repentance? Ignore it? Seek immediate help?
- If you are married, how is your discussion of this weakness or these weak points with your spouse?
- Do you think you have been too casual in your exposure to lust-driven entertainment?
- Is there a certain form of electronic media that is more tempting for you than others?
- How has your focus on God and His beauty been a specific form of meditation and joy?
- Do you rely on the Holy Spirit and grace of God to give you victory? Have you specifically prayed about those weak points of temptation and asked for God’s help?
- Do you need to take any drastic measures for a period of time?
- Are you willing to commit yourself to intense discipleship (biblical counseling) for a period of time in order to see more growth and victory in this area?
Taken from Appendix 1, Soul Purity: A Workbook For Counselors And Small Groups.
Final thought to those desiring accountability: Accountability is a one-another kind of activity with both sides of the partnership being committed whole-heartedly to the work. Accountability always will fail if one or the other is not faithful to follow through. Saying, “keep me accountable” puts all the pressure and weight on one person. Group accountability is even better than just one-on-one.
