Integrity and honesty seem to have fallen on hard times in the Christian realm. So have kindness and thoughtfulness. I wonder if Christian people even recognize that they have immunized themselves from the realities of their sin? We talk about worldliness, and our discussion seems to migrate towards certain visible lifestyles or clothing choices or distasteful places we visit. But should it not be more of a concern that Christians can be just as dishonest, just as unkind, and just as mean as some unbelievers around them? 
In the following paragraphs, let me give you some examples of the kinds of things I know go on or I have witnessed going on or I have known to have gone on. I have experienced directly or in counseling other believers who have shared with my wife and me the way Christian people acted toward them. And I realize that some of the “Christians” out there really are not followers of Christ at all. We address this issue of “nasty” Christians in another article here; they are masquerading as believers but have no real relationship with God. These negative situations I understand. But this fact does not explain all the lack of Christian virtues that actual believers display at times. Unfortunately, I believe, many Christians have become accustomed to living a certain way. And also, unfortunately, no one it seems has pointed out the lack of the fruit of the Spirit of God in their lives or the lack of evidence of His presence when they encounter negative life situations. Oh, and one more thought. It would be more evident that they recognize their lack of godliness if they came back later and admitted their fault, confessed it, and asked forgiveness. But they do not. Let’s move on to some concrete examples.
Example: We lived near a local venue that hosted an annual conference for pastors and Christian workers. At this conference, the hosts and conference workers dealt with the pastors and laypersons that attended. What have these pastors been known to do? Complain. Treat the workers with disrespect. Expect service 24/7 regardless of what else was going on at the moment or what time of night it was. The venue nurse shared with us that one man called her at 11 pm at her home to demand cough syrup for a roommate that was snoring. When she arrived at his room with the cough syrup, he did not express thanks but said, “Oh, I guess I don’t need that.” He did not apologize for taking her out of her home and out into the cold, winter night only to arrive back at her home past midnight.
Example: A couple of friends of ours have been involved in or are involved in finances in Christian institutions of higher learning. They have to follow up on those folks who have not paid their bills, or they advise families on financing their children’s college education. Now I am not exaggerating when I state that a fairly high percentage of Christians that owe debt to colleges don’t expect to pay these bills. They avoid responding to the calls. They say that they cannot pay the bill. They literally have been known to swear at the one calling them to collect money on their bill. I understand that people may fall on hard times and ask for an extension on a bill. That response is not even in the picture here. Those lacking virtue simply don’t intend to pay. They say that they have no intention. “You are a big college (university), and you can afford to let this go.” And another friend explained that when she called “Christian” parents about financing through grants or loans, she cannot tell us the number of times that she has been sworn at by pastors, yelled at, called names, spoken to rudely, or hung up on.
Example: I worked in a Christian camp for two decades. One trend we noticed in the last 6-8 years was that we would get a college student signed up to work for camp, including signing a contract that they agreed to. This meant that the camp leadership would see that position and responsibility for the summer had been filled. Then, sometime in the late spring, sometimes 3-4 weeks before camp training began, the camp would get a call or email letting them know the college student was not coming–backing out of a signed contract. Imagine what this action does to the camp staff situation. Again, I understand if an emergency comes up that prevents them from coming to serve. But I am not speaking of that kind of situation. Usually the camp was informed that the student had an opportunity to make better money and would not be able to work camp. Think about it. They knew the state of their finances already when they signed the contract. They should never have signed and promised to serve if they were going to potentially back out.
Example: In dealing with certain Christians from the south, we have been told that an ethic of “southern gentility” is the ruling moral code. In other words, they excuse dishonesty to your face by considering that it is better to give you a nice feeling by being kind to your face, while really not telling you the whole story or the exact situation. They don’t consider it lying or false conception-giving. They are just too kind to tell you all the facts. Well, what an amazing way to lie!
Example: One faithful worker in a Christian institution was told that everyone received approximately the same salary. When he inquired as to his woefully low income for the hours that he put in, the response from the administration was always the same: everyone is on a horizontal flow chart here. Everyone gets paid the same salary approximately. Years passed, and he found out via a local town resident the amount that one of the other employees was paid at that Christian institution. He was shocked that he had been being paid about 1/3 of what someone else made who did not put in the same workload. How can administrations live with themselves consistently lying to employees like that? God knows, and He is sovereign over these injustices, but the realities are shocking to say the least.
In conclusion, let’s answer our question: What happened to Christian virtues? The answer is that those virtues still exist in those who are committed to biblical ethics and Christ-like living. The question becomes the following: will we fit into the unethical mode of treating other folks, or will we purpose in our hearts to please God regardless of what the norm tends to excuse?
Interesting observations.